


Everything Went Wrong

by MiraculousMaribug



Series: A Fool No More [3]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Akumatized Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Angst, Depressed Marinette Dupain-Cheng, F/M, Gen, Panic Attacks, Post Puppeteer 2, Reveal, Running Away, Sad Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Triggers, Will be added - Freeform, alternate take on my series
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-31
Updated: 2019-08-04
Packaged: 2020-07-27 07:55:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20042530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiraculousMaribug/pseuds/MiraculousMaribug
Summary: What happens if Kagami doesn't approach Marinette on Monday? What if she decided to run away when it became too much? Alternate take on my series A Fool No More. Warning ; This version is way darker than my original story some chapters will be triggering and some strong language will be dropped here and there. If you're not okay with this I don't recommend reading. If you are though go right on ahead.





	1. Run

_ Marinette/Ladybug's pov _

The thoughts were eating at her, consuming her, she was drowning in them. 

_ Worthless. Stupid. Pathetic. Not good enough for anyone. _

The voices in my head repeating the words over and over again. It was driving me insane. The tears pooled out my eyes as I hugged myself within the darkness of my room. Somewhere far away it seemed I could hear the beeping of her phone, and a squeaky voice. Everything was muffled though so I couldn't understand anything. It had been 4 days since the incident at school. He rejected her, they laughed at her for trying to improve, it made her feel worthless. _ Why did no one care about my feelings? _ I knew the alarm would go off eventually and that I'd have to go to school but why should I? What was the point? They were just gonna laugh at me again. The tears kept falling soaking my face. Then I blanked. 

Everything happened so fast. The alarm rang. Maman called me for breakfast. Tikki said something. The phone beeped again. I called my transformation, went out the balcony, and ran to an abandoned building. I didn't realize what I was doing all I knew was that I was running away from the cloud the surroundings were bringing upon me. 

When I came to my senses I realized the panic I might've just brought upon people. Flashes of the publics faces as she sped across rooftops came to her. Shock, surprise, panic. Although these thoughts were quickly overthrown with the realization that I just ran away. By now her mother must've realized right? She could go back, play off that she took an early walk. It dawned on me though that I didn't want to go back. Back to the people who laughed at my despair, to the parents that while they may have tried their best it certainly isn't helping me in any way. Leaving me to deal with the situation on my own. I wouldn't have usually minded but this was different. Everyone laughed, then Alya started sending those messages calling her ridiculous to stop being a baby and come back. It was too much for me to handle. Everything was going wrong. She just wanted to get better why is that such a problem?

The soft thud of feet landing snapped me out of my daze.

"Bug..? Is everything okay? The public seemed to be in a semi-panic, something about seeing you dashing around the roofs like if you had just been alerted of an Akuma.." I could hear someone say. The voice sounded familiar, I knew the voice but why couldn't I place a name to it? What was going on? Her surroundings suddenly blurred as everything became increasingly hot, her heart racing almost in a panicked state. What's happening to her? Her head began to hurt a tremendous amount. She clutched her head, her ears began ringing, everything started spinning. She felt the person approach her, they said something but it was muffled. The pain got worse, the ringing got louder, her heart beat faster, then everything went dark.

_ Adrien/Chat's pov _

I woke up early today, really early actually. It would be at least another hour or so before Nathalie came to give mw my schedule of the day, so I decided getting some fresh air as my alter ego couldn't hurt. I didn't go to far from the house but far enough that I couldn't see it, I sat on the rooftop drinking in the beauty of the sunrise. I had been sitting there for no more than 10 minutes when the commotion began.

_ "Was that Ladybug?" _

_"Is there an akuma?" _

_"She was running quite fast" _

_"She doesn't look too well" _

_"Are we in danger?" _

The public's shouts worried me, was there an akuma? Ladybug hadn't notified him of anything, but the public seems worried. What was the comment about her not looking too good? Maybe she's going through something? Millions of explanations and questions ran through my head before I decided I might as well go see her myself. I tried calling her but to my dismay, no response. So I pulled up the map that stated her location if she was in-suit and ran to it. 

As I landed I immediately noticed something was off. Her shoulder were slumped and she looked pale with her cheeks red. _ Had she been crying? _ I thought.

"Bug..? Is everything okay? The public seemed to be in a semi-panic, something about seeing you dashing around the roofs like if you had just been alerted of an Akuma..." I said softly. She didn't respond, instead she started looking around as if she had lost something. Then she started trembling and clutching her head. I was worried then, but now i'm really worried. I approached her slowly standing just behind her before speaking again.

"Ladybug? What's wrong? You don't look okay.." I asked. Worry and confusion in my voice, again no response from her. I saw her clutch her head harder as tears pooled from her eyes, before collapsing. With my quick reflexes I caught her and gently sat down on the floor, cradling her in my arms. My thoughts ran wild.

_ "Was she sick?" _

_"Why is she like this? What's happening?" _

Questions swam through my head. I tried shaking her a little in hope she'd wake up but she was out cold, her body still shaking. I pulled her up a bit and layed my head near her chest, her heart was beating incredibly fast. _ Could it have been a panic attack? _ I couldn't figure out what to so I just sat there cradling her. Before long she was awake again.

"Ch-chat..?" her voice came out hoarse from all the crying. I looked down at her before pulling her in for a hug.

"You're okay.. I'm here for you bug. What's going on, is something happening to you in your civilian life?" I asked my voice gentle. I felt her shift position as she nestled her face in my neck.

"Everything's going wrong.." she whispered another tear spilling from her eye. I wiped it away with my gloved finger and gave her a soft squeeze of reassurance. 

She looked like she was gonna say something but snapped her jaw shut before wiggling out of my grasp. I looked at her the feeling of worry not leaving. She stood up and turned to face me.

"I'm sorry you had to see me this way" she said. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying, her cheeks stained red with tears. I got up and cupped her cheek rubbing it soothingly.

"You don't have to apologize we all have our moments. Are you okay now? You can always talk to me you know." She looked him in the eye. Her eyes had lost their shine, she looked sad I noticed. I wanted to help her but she wasn't talking to me.

"I'm okay just tired I'll be better soon. Thank you for caring Kitty" she said before taking her yo-yo out and leaving not even giving me a chance to say goodbye. I wanted to follow her but if I did Nathalie would probably open his door to find his room empty so I just went home.

_ Marinette/Ladybug's pov _

Once again zipping through the roofs of Paris I found myself, I wasn't heading in the directions of the bakery or the school, instead I was heading in the complete opposite direction. I didn't know what I was doing really. She knew her parents would notice sooner or later that she isn't at home or school, but she couldn't bring herself to worry about it. 

After some time I found myself in a more deserted part of the city. Mainly used by homeless or thugs making deals with others. I knew that while this isn't the best place to find myself in, it was the only place people wouldn't look. She needed to take a pause from her life. Another cloud was forming around her head. Thoughts telling her that she didn't need to go back, that she was at peace here. The thoughts were deceiving she knew she had to go back eventually but a part of her wanted to give in.

I found myself landing at another abandoned building, what seemed to be an apartment building with some worn out furniture left behind. The place was extremely dusty so nobody must be staying in it. I decided i'd stay here a while to get myself together. Opening up the yo-yo to reveal the phone-like features in it I turned off the location so not even Chat could find me. I needed some time alone. 

Dropping her transformation she sat down on the couch dusting it off a bit.

"What am I doing" I whispered. Tikki flying up to her.

"Marinette you need to go home, you're parents are gonna get worried." the little red kwami said pleadingly. I turned away from her, bringing my legs up to my chest.

"I just need a breather i'll go back soon." Tikki didn't seem all to swayed by my response but agreed nonetheless.

Everything started coming back to her, Alya's words, Adrien's rejection, her parents inability to help, worrying the public. She should be facing her problems like always but instead she ran away from them. She felt like a bad friend, daughter, ladybug, and overall person. She's gonna end up worrying everybody if she didn't go back now. She made to stand up but her body worked against her. 

'What's the point of going back? To suffer? It's not worth it. Stay here.' The voice in her head said.

The voice was right, this was her way of escaping the pain from her life, but she knew she couldn't stay. She called on Tikki and transformed as she reluctantly went back home.

Nobody had noticed I was missing so I went about the morning before making my way to school. I felt nervous and sad, I really didn't wanna be here. Alya had seen me arrive and immediately approached me. Screaming in my face about the worry I've caused her and the idiocy in my actions. Her words hurt me. _ 'Why are you so mean to me now? _ the thought lingered in my head. I could only mutter a sorry to Alya before we made our way to class. Nino gave me a pitied look, and Adrien didn't even look my way. 

Upon entering class I was greeted by the sight of Lila speaking to the class about how someone has been skipping class as an excuse for some action. She only heard the skipping class part so she was confused as to what Lila was lying about now.

"Oh Marinette! You finally showed up! Are you done trying to hide the fact that you deliberately wrote a bunch of mean letters to everyone and placed them in their lockers while you were 'at home'" she said smirking making quote marks at the end of her statement. Everyone looked at me. Some looked disappointed and others were straight up mad. I didn't even have the chance to say I didn't do it before everyone started shouting at me. It didn't last long thankfully as Miss Bustier had arrived and had everyone quiet down and explain what was happening. Lila of course 'explained' everything I had 'done' which caused her to look at me disapprovingly before sending me to wait outside. 

Once outside I got scolded for something I didn't do and despite the fact I was trying to defend myself the teacher didn't budge, so I decided gave up and accepted my faith. From then on my day only got worse. During lunch there was an akuma and during battle I let my emotions best me causing me to fail at catching the akumafied object, which led to people getting hurt and buildings being destroyed. Eventually the akuma was purified and everything was fixed but I was still met with the peoples' harsh criticism, some even going as far as saying that I wasn't cut out for being a hero. Chat Noir tried to defend her but I told him to let it go, after all they were right, before heading off. Back at school I was treated horribly once again as Chloe with the help of Kim and Sabrina verbally and physically abused of me. But her breaking point was when Adrien consulted me about how he couldn't consider someone like me a friend anymore because of what Lila claimed she had done. I didn't even let him finish, instead I chose to walk out of school skipping the rest of my classes and transforming in an alleyway.

\---

That day her parents never saw her come home, the next day she wasn't at school, and by the afternoon she was alerted to be missing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really proud of how this chapter turned out. It's certainly a way darker take on how my story could've gone, but one I'm really excited to explore. In a way this version of the story is more based off personal experience and feelings so it's a little more personal to me. Anyways as always any advice you have my writing is always appreciated as I'm always looking to improve until next time!


	2. Realization

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Adrien stops being stupid, and revelations are made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning ; This chapter has mentions of self harm if this triggers you I recommend you don't read.

_ Adrien/Chat's pov _

After the whole situation with Ladybug, telling Nathalie I wasn't in my room because I was showering, getting my schedule told as I eat breakfast alone, I was finally making my way to school. I was hoping Marinette would show up today, she's been absent for just about 3 school days after the whole rejection issue. I felt really guilty about it honestly but after talking with Ladybug the other day I'm encouraged to fix things between us. 

I made my way to my locker to grab my necessities for the day when I realized a little note at the bottom.

_ "Can't believe I was ever friends with you, you're a bad friend and a bad son. No wonder you dad doesn't let you enjoy life. You shouldn't" _

The words were harsh it certainly brought a downfall to my mood. I should probably leave talking to Marinette tomorrow, I shouldn't sour her mood too. That is, if she shows up. Which I didn't have to wait long to find out. As I waiting with Nino to see if Marinette would arrive we heard Alya screaming at someone. I felt bad for whoever it was that had to face Alya's wrath. To Nino and I's surprise it had shown to be Marinette who fell victim to Alya. I saw Nino give her a pitied look, I would've probably asked if she was okay but that note had me in a really bad mood. Once at class we saw Lila talking to the class about someone skipping class. I didn't pay much attention though usually whatever she says is a lie anyways. At least I wasn't paying attention until she addressed Marinette.

"Oh Marinette! You finally showed up! Are you done trying to hide the fact that you deliberately wrote a bunch of mean letters to everyone and placed them in their lockers while you were 'at home'" she had said quoting the at home part. _ Wait Marinette wrote the note? _ If he thought about it, it made sense. She probably got offended by my rejection and decided to write all that stuff. Everyone was looking and shouting at her whether disappointed or mad, but I couldn't bring myself to even look at her. _ How could she? _ He felt angry and disappointed at the girl he once called friend. Eventually Miss Bustier walked in asking us about our commotion. Lila spoke for everyone and Miss Bustier sent Marinette outside before heading outside herself. When she came back in with Marinette she started class and the day went by as usual. 

At lunch there was an akuma which took longer to defeat. Ladybug seemed to still be down from whatever happened to her this morning. She made a small mistake, people got hurt building go wrecked, but in the end she fixed everything back to normal so I didn't see why the people were so riled up. Telling her things like she wasn't cut out for this. Like if they knew anything about our jobs? I tried to defend telling them we all have our off days and that they should just be glad everyone is safe but she shut me down.

"Let it go Chat, they're right maybe I'm not cut out for this. What type of superhero lets their emotions get in the way of their work?" she said downcast before taking off. Her words infuriated me. How dare anyone make her feel such a way? As badly as I wanted to lash out on the people who made her feel like that I decided against it and just left with a disapproving glare at the people we work so hard to protect. Back at school I stumbled upon Marinette, I was still mad over what she did. I decided to approach her to get some type of definitive answer over her actions.

"Listen Marinette, what you did was wrong. I know you felt bad the other day but that's no excuse to make others feel the same way. I can't be friends with someone like that that note really hurt-" I couldn't even finished my sentence before she walked away. She couldn't even face her mistake. I ignored my thoughts and just went to class I could always try again later. She never went back to class though. I couldn't tell if anybody noticed other than the teacher, but then again no one seemed to care after what she'd done.

The next day she wasn't in class again and people started speculating whether or not she'd do something else. The day went by as usual until after lunch.

"Students I dread to say this but, Marinette's parents have alerted the school that she has gone missing. She never made it home yesterday and they are very worried about her. I know some of her actions lately haven't been all too nice but right now I need you all to put that behind you. The police are asking all of you to assist in her search and if any of you know anything about where she is or why she could've gone missing to please let them know immediately." she told us her tone getting sadder as she went on. Most of us where shocked to hear so. She's never seemed to be the type to run away. Could she have been kidnapped? Maybe it was after she walked away from our conversation? Questions arose in my head trying to figure something out. 

"Adrien was the last to see her yesterday." Nathaniel said. Everyone looked towards me.

"Where did she go after you saw her?" Alya asked, her voice coming out with a worried tone.

"She.. she just walked away while I was talking to her. I thought she was going to class.." I trailed off. Miss Bustier shook her head. 

Class was dismissed early that day so we could assist in Marinette's search. Her parents had gone on the news asking for Ladybug and Chat Noir to help search for her, and the mayor held a conference asking for them as well. As soon as I heard I transform and met with the mayor and her parents expecting Ladybug to be there. She wasn't. _ Maybe she hasn't heard yet? _ We were searching until nightfall but found nothing so everyone had gone home. I decided to call Ladybug and advise about what was happening. She appeared to be in suit, the call didn't immediately hang up like it would if she weren't, yet she didn't answer. So I went to my second option and pulled up to map to see her location but it didn't show up. _ Weird _ I thought. I checked around the city once more and headed home.

At home I got out my homework for the day which wasn't much since the day got cut short, when the note fell out of my bag. I reluctantly grabbed it. _ It's not like Marinette to do these kinds of things _ I started thinking. I decided to get a note Marinette had given to me some time ago when she passed on some class notes. I looked between them when I noticed something.

"That's not Marinette's handwriting" I said. I heard Plagg struggling to come out of the cheese box he was in.

"What are you talking about?" He asked finally freeing himself.

"Come look." I told him. He flew over to me and examined the note.

"About time you realize it" he grunted before going back to get more cheese.

"What do you mean?" I asked looking over time.

"Only an idiot would believe that Liar girl's claim that pigtails wrote such things. She's a cinnamon roll she wouldn't even hurt a fly" he said back.

"Since when do you know Marinette so well?" He looked at me as chewed his cheese.

"I just do stop asking stuff. Anyways how much you wanna bet that if you compare Liar's handwriting to the note from your locker you'll find a striking similarity." He had a point. If the handwritings any proof then Marinette couldn't have possibly written the note the handwritings are way top different. I came up with a plan on how to clear Mari's name with everyone, did my homework, and went to bed. Tomorrow Lila would get what she deserves.

I woke up early the next day and went over my plan again. 

"I'll get Lila to write me something, compare it to the note show how Marinette's handwriting is way different than the notes and then everyone we'll see Marinette hasn't done anything.' I said repeating to myself so I wouldn't forget.

I got to class just as the bell rang, thankfully Miss Bustier let it slip by unnoticed. I went up to her and asked her to let me say something to the class and that'd it wouldn't take long. She nodded and I called Lila.

"Hey Lila can you come up here a second? I just want to say that with everything that's going on I was thinking that we need a new class president and that you'd be perfect for the job." The class looked shocked at my sudden statement.

"Oh wow thank you Adrien but I feel it would be wrong for me to take Marinette's place while she's missing and all" she said in a sickening sweet tone.

"That's my point though, we need a class president to stand in her place until she's found" I added, I looked to Miss Bustier for approval. She looked shocked but nodded.

"At least until she comes back.. its not a bad idea. Do you agree Lila?" She asked. Lila nodded happily. Miss Bustier grabbed a sheet of paper and had Lila write down some words saying she agrees to the responsibilities. When she was done I looked over to the paper. The handwriting matched just as Plagg had suspected. I grabbed the sheet and spoke again.

"Hey Lila.. have you noticed how similar you're handwriting is to the notes we received that were supposedly from Marinette?" I asked as sincerely as I could. Her expression was shocked as she stuttered out a no.

"Actually now that I think about your handwriting matches perfectly with the one on the notes." I added on her face paling.

"Haha haha very funny Adrien but I told you I saw Marinette put them in your lockers" she retorted back. The class stayed silent. I pulled out the 2 notes and put the side to side on the sheet Lila wrote in before handing it to Nino and telling him to pass it around.

"Wh-what are you doing?" she said seeing as everyone looked at the papers.

"Marinette never wrote the notes, and she never put them in our lockers. You did. The pink paper was a note I got from Marinette a short time ago and if you look her handwriting matches nothing to the notes we received, but if you compare the note to Lila's handwriting it matches perfectly. As the rest of the class saw the similarities , Alya stood up.

"You bitch! You've been lying to us all along! Has anything you've said ever been true? I turned against my best friend because of you, siding with you instead of her! I trusted you! All of us did! How could you!?" Alya shouted before being joined by everyone else.

Miss Bustier quieted everyone down and sent Lila to see the principal to be reprimanded for her actions.

"We treated her terribly yesterday.. and now she's missing" said Rose quietly as she started to cry. Juleka turned to give her a hug. The class fell into a gloomy state as the weight over how we treated her dawned upon us.

"We're horrible people" added Sabrina.

It was then that my main motive was to find her and to fix everything. With Lila now exposed and all of us coming to our senses, Marinette's disappearance took an extra heavy toll on us. I mentally promised her I'd bring her home, and I planned to go through with it.

A whole week passed with no sign of Marinette or Ladybug. Once again the public jumped at the chance to criticize her on how she's not assisting in her search. I felt bad for Ladybug she seems to be going through a rough patch, but she should at least give me some sort of sign that she's okay.

A month passed and still nothing from Marinette or Ladybug or heck not even Hawkmoth. People were starting to give up. Even if they found her they suspect she'd be dead by now. I refused to believe so along with her family and classmates. 2 weeks after that a akuma appeared and that's when Ladybug came out into the open. The akuma was fierce and although her lucky charms practically said to get the other heroes she decided against it. I found it strange. 

We both took pretty hard hits during the battle Although out of both of us she seemed to be taking the worst of them. One of the hits ended up tearing her suit. I was deeply worried about her. After hours of fighting the akuma was purified and Ladybug made to leave but before she could I grabbed her wrist. She hissed in pain and I sputtered out an apology before asking her if we could catch up somewhere. She hesitantly agreed and waved goodbye then left. While she was waving something red caught my eye. In the area the akuma tore her suit at there were red slits on her skin. I figured it was akuma but quickly shut that thought down what I realized that the akuma couldn't have made such small slits. My mind thought of the worst, I made a mental note to talk to her about it when we meet.

Around the time the sun was setting I found myself landing on the same roof I had found Ladybug in during her episode all those weeks back. _ Is the reason behind that the same as why she's been gone and why her skin was.. harmed _ I thought to myself as I heard her land.

"Long time no see M'lady" I told her with a wink as I approached her to kiss her hand. It was then I realized how bad she looked. Her eyes were dull with dark bags under them, her skin as pale as snow, and the fact I could see her ribs poking through her suit. My expression turned in a worried one.

"Ladybug.. wha-whats going with you?" I asked softly.

"Nothing I've just been busy." her voice was raspy like she hadn't had anything to drink. 

"Don't lie to me bug.. I can see it in your eyes it's definitely not nothing. You looked tired and pale and sad... Talk to me what's happening to you?" I said taking her hand in mine rubbing it with my thumb gently. She looked at me with teary eyes before crashing into me as she cried.

"I can't take this anymore Chat. I've lost everything and everyone.. I can't go home.. I-I.. I can't even face you because of god.. I'm so broken" her voice breaking up. I hugged her tightly as she cried into me.

"Don't say that you haven't lost everything. I don't know what's happening but I'm gonna do my best to help you okay? Don't ever be afraid to face me no matter how broken you may be because I'm always gonna be there to help you piece yourself back together. You're never gonna lose me bugaboo" she clutched him harder as she tried to control sobs. I sat us down gently and pulled her into my lap as I rubbed her back.

"I've got you don't worry, cry all you need I've got you, I won't leave until you want me to" I cooed trying to sooth her.

After a while she had calmed down.

"I'm sorry I haven't helped in looking for that girl.." she apologized quietly.

"Don't apologize you're facing your own thing right now" I told her in reassurance.

"Can I.. ask something?" I asked her. She lifted her head and nodded shifting so we could be more comfortable.

"During the battle.. I.. when your suit was torn I saw some red slits on your skin are they.. self inflicted?" She tensed up and looked away.

"Would you think of me differently if they were" she asked softly. I knew why she asked.

"No I wouldn't" I told her as I gently grabbed her chin and turned her head to face me. She was tearing up again.

"I'm sorry" her voice hoarse as she looked down. My heart broke at her confirmation of my suspicions. I cupped her cheek and placed a kiss on her forehead before pulling her into me. _ How did I fail to notice how sad she was? _ Tears fell outta my eyes as we found ourselves crying together. He felt as if he failed her as a best friend and a partner. He held her tightly scared that if he let go she's disappear on him again. He felt her cup his cheeks wiping his tears as he gripped her back and waist tighter. Red and puffy eyed they stared at each other drowning in each others eyes. Before they both leaned in and closed the gap. All of the pent up emotions they had were poured out into their kiss. All the worry, sadness, and loneliness over Marinette's disappearance, Ladybug's situation and everything he's been holding inside of him felt released. The kiss lasted around a minute or two before they pulled away touching foreheads.

"Promise me you'll talk to me when you're down" he whispered to her. "Promise you won't disappear on me too" she gave him another chaste kiss.

"I promise" she whispered back to him. 

They stayed there laying in each others embrace for while before Chat got an idea.

"Can I take you somewhere?" he asked her. She reluctantly nodded and he picked her up bridal style before using his stick to help them reach their destination.

He took her to the bakery and at the counter ordered them some sweets (mainly for her). He looked over to her and saw her staring at the Dupain-Chengs.

"Even with they're daughter missing they still keep business going." I told her sitting down adjacent of her. She nodded her face turning sad.

"Whats wrong?" I said putting my hand over hers.

"I just.. feel bad for them." she whispered.

"Me too" I said as the sweets arrived.

"Oh my! Ladybug you don't seem to well. Tom can you make some tea and get extra bread!" Mrs. Cheng said. Ladybug blushed and tried telling her it was alright.

"Nonsense, I will not let Paris' super heroine out my shop knowing she very noticeably hasn't been eating enough." she had told Ladybug as Mr.Dupain arrive with some tea and extra bread. Ladybug thanked them and asked if they'd like to stay with us a while. They agreed and pulled up some chairs.

"I'm sorry about your daughter.."she told them as she sipped the tea.

"Marinette is strong wherever she is I'm sure she okay, I just hope she finds her way home to us soon." Mr.Dupain said.

"Her friends come over every day apologizing and blaming themselves and while we keep telling them they're forgiven they say that until she's home safe and sound they'll never forgive themselves" Mrs.Cheng added. Despite her situation she seemed to be doing well and keeping her hopes high. Ladybug nodded at her words and smiled. We both stayed there for a bit more time before departing.

"You heading home Ladybug?" I asked as we stopped on a roof. She gave me a sad smile and shook her head. My eyebrow shot up questioningly.

"I can't go home Chat.. I meant it when I said I lost my home" she told me.

"That can't be.. are you living on the streets? What happened?" I was once again worried. 

"I left them.. and I can't go back" she said looking off at the sky.

"Bug.. I'm sure your parents must be worried. I-I can't just let you leave without being sure you're staying somewhere warm tonight. My voice ending in a firm tone.

"If I go back now they'll be expecting their daughter.. thats not me anymore." She said ending off in a whisper before quickly taking off. I knew I had to get home before someone noticed I was gone but I wasn't just gonna leave her like this. I messed up with Marinette and now I don't know if I'll ever see her again, I won't make the same mistake with Ladybug.

So I took off in the same direction she did. When she stopped I found myself in the more deserted area of Paris, she had landed in an abandoned apartment building and detransformed. I knew she didn't was us to reveal ourselves but this was for her own good. I took out my staff and used the camera feature to get a better look on her. What I saw left me shocked.

"Marinette?" I whispered to myself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cliffhanger because I can :) Don't worry third chapter will be out soon. Also I threw independent Mari out the window whoops- As always if you have any insight on my writing please let me know its greatly appreciated. Until next time.


	3. Butterflies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hawkmoth realizes a fault in his plan, and Chat tries to find out what happened.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the original plan was that I'd remake chapter 2 and turn it in Mari's pov for chapter 3 but that plan got scrapped so here we are.

_ [ Marinette/Ladybug's pov ] _

The voice was barely audible, but after weeks of silence it would be almost impossible to not hear it. I contemplated looking towards the source but found myself hesitant. _ Please don't be Chat _ I prayed to myself as I quickly turned to face the voice.

"Chat.." my voice came out a whisper as I felt my knees get weak. We locked eyes before he jumped over standing on the window frame.

"Ladyb- no.. Marinette.. is it really? Please don't let this be a sick illusion" his voice was hoarse as tears brimmed his eyes. I felt guilty and ashamed that he caught me like this. We both stayed staring at each other for another while before he spoke again.

"Please come home" his voice a soft whisper as he pleaded to me. I knew if I let myself speak I'd jump right into his arms begging for him to take me back to the warmth of my room and parents, so instead I just shook my head. I saw a tear escape his eye as he made his way towards me. I backed up suddenly feeling a wall behind me, I was cornered. 

"Chat.. I-I told you I can't go back" I tried to reason with him.

"Yes you can" he said before taking my hand in his. Suddenly remembering the slits on my wrist I tried pulling away but he held on.

"They want Marinette to come home.. not me. I'm not Marinette" my gaze shifted towards the floor as my knees finally gave in and I fell into his arms. The room remained silent as tears streamed down both of our faces. I felt my eyelids getting heavy and I gave in to sleep. For once during this whole mess I felt warm.

When I awoke again I was in my room with my mom sitting on my chaise.

"Marinette? Are you awake?" She asked approaching my bed. I sat up and looked at her, recalling that I wasn't supposed to be here. _ Dammit Chat. _

We didn't say anything to each other she just pulled me into a hug as she silently cried on my shoulder. I heard her whisper thank yous and I'm sorrys as she held me. When she pulled away she wiped her eyes and called my father up.

"Marinette!" The relief in his voice was clear as he pulled me into him in a bone crushing hug.

"I knew you'd come back!" His voice was pure of joy, and the happiness bounced off of him as he put me down.

"We were so worried dear. Are you okay? What happened?" Maman asked me. My lips pressed into a thin line as everything that had happened in the last 3 months came back to me. The loneliness, betrayal, hurt, tears, and pain. I felt the tears threaten to surface but I forcefully pushed them down and turned away from my parents heading back to bed. My parents stood there in shock and decided to give me space. With a hug and kiss they were gone. I felt the urge to run again and got up preparing to transform when Chat dropped in through my skylight.

"Ch-chat?!" His sudden appearance had be taken aback. _ What is he doing here? _

"Please don't try to run again" his voice gentle as he stood in front of me. Pain evident in his eyes. In that moment I didn't know what came over me, but I suddenly felt angry.

"Why do you care?" I seethed turning to face the wall. He slipped his gloved hand into mine and turned me around again, cupping my cheek with his free hand. I felt his breath fan my face as he leaned in and flashbacks from last night roamed my head. _ Why did I even kiss him last night? _

I made to pull away but he caught my lips with his before I could and I melted into the kiss. He made me feel warm. Then I remembered that the one he loved was Ladybug. She was gone too. I broke the kiss and called on my transformation, trying to make a run for it. He caught my wrist and held me tight against him.

"Why do you keep doing this?" The sadness in his voice broke my heart. _ I don't want to hurt you. _

"I don't belong here. I'm broken and sad and a mess. For gods sake my body is filled with scars." I told him. I felt him put a light kiss on my shoulder.

"And even so I still love you, broken with scars and all." Heat creeped up my neck at the sound of his words. I held back from turning around and kissing him to death and stood there with his arms around me.

"Let's go for a run" he mumbled into my shoulder and I lightly nodded.

We ran for a while before finding ourselves in a secluded roof with a garden on it. I plopped down on the roof taking in the morning air. Chat came and sat next to me intertwining our fingers together. Neither of us said a word everything was quiet, a comfortable type of quiet. At least until he spoke.

"It was cause of Lila.. wasn't it?" He hung his head low like if he were guilty. I nodded shyly. He took a deep breath I couldn't tell if it was out if frustration or something else. He started whispering sorrys to me, his voice growing shakier by the second. I looked over to him and lifted his chin.

"It's not your faul-" I couldn't finish. "I should've been there for you!-Fuck! I'm-I'm such a bad friend a-and partner!" his shouts turned to sobs as he broke in front of me. A part of me broke seeing him cry, especially over someone as worthless as me. I hugged him tightly. "It's okay" I whispered rubbing his back. He calmed down after a couple of minutes and he took me back to my house.

"I'll come back in a bit, I promise" he gave me a soft kiss and left. I sighed. I didn't want him to leave, he's the only one that makes me feel safe. It was then I noticed a darkened butterfly approach. My eyes went wide in fear. "Oh god-" I backed away looking in the direction Chat left hoping he was still near, he wasn't. The butterfly got closer and closer _ it's over now huh? _ I thought thinking to how Chat would be on his own. I stood there waiting for the voice to invade my head, but it never did. The butterfly stayed close to me but it didn't akumatize me.

\--------------------------

The sun had set and Chat still wasn't back. I didn't want to think negatively about it but I couldn't help myself. More time passed and it was 2 am. _ He's not coming.. _ I thought. I heard the flapping of wings and noticed another butterfly had approached me. There's two of them now. Close but not akumatizing me. I found it odd.

[ Gabriel/Hawkmoth's pov ]  
_ I could sense her pain, her sadness, the hopelessness lying in her. I sent another akuma but it was no use. _

"Why isn't it working!" I shouted. I knew if I could akumatize her I'd achieve one of my strongest akuma ever. Marinette already had a hefty amount of negative emotions in her, but with the added bonus of her miraculous she'd be more powerful than anyone other akuma. I had to be patient though, patient enough so my butterflies could get her at her lowest point.

[ Marinette/Ladybug's pov ]

I woke up startled. I felt the akumas near me. I knew that at this point they wouldn't leave me alone. Tikki had already given me the rundown. _ One akuma isn't strong enough to akumatize you even when you're at your lowest _ I recalled her saying. 

It was half past ten in the morning and I still hadn't heard from Chat. I worried. _ Did I push him away? No! Stop! He wouldn't leave me like this.. right?_ A third akuma approached. I sighed. _ How many more till I become the worst of me? Oh wait. I already am._ I felt my wrists, all bumpy and sore from the cuts. I heard whispers telling me to do more. I tried my best to shove them away. 

It didn't work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had this in my drafts for ages, sorry if it's a bit weird. I've reread the story like 30 times trying to recall what I was doing with this story.


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